We understand that the exchange life will make you feel like you’re a tumbling around in the juggling hands of Fate, but despair no more. The stars are here to provide you with guidance and keep you upright.
Virgo: Aug 23 – Sep 22
The diagonal line between neptune and venus tells us you’re living the good life now, all accustomed to the Netherlands and the party-life. We have seen you in Carpe intoxicated and on cloud 9 more than a few times now. Way to go! However pay attention as this is not a good month for you moneywise. Maybe smile a bit more to the cute bartender next time?
Libra: Sep 23 – Oct 22
Not unlike this prediction you’ll be very late this month. But don’t panic just yet about your periodical monthly physicalities, no need to be fearing a mini-me yet. You better worry about your social life instead. Pay attention to your friends or they will feel obliged to end their love for you. Pro tip: buy them a shot at the next party, nothing a little alcohol can’t fix.
Scorpio: Oct 23 – Nov 21
As absent as Pluto is in the lists of planets, as unfindable were you this month in Carpe Noctem. We haven’t seen you in a long while and we do kind of miss you. With the right amount of friends and good music you tend to really set the tone for a good party. So for the sake of all the other people at I*ESN; come back!
Sagittarius: Nov 22 – Dec 21
The angle mars is in this month tells us a lot about you. And we’ll be honest: this will not be a good month for you. Your social life as well as your study.. It doesn’t look good. We advise you to stay in bed this month, eat chocolate, and watch the latest season of Narco’s. But hey, look at the bright side, after this month you’ll have 11 whole months where it will most probably suck a little less!
Capricorn: Dec 22 – Jan 19
Earth and some other planets line up perfectly this month. This doesn’t say much, but it is nice to know because your month will be nice and neat as well! Unlike the Sagittariuses among us you will have one of the best months this year. Pity it’s almost over hah?
Aquarius: Jan 20 – Feb 18
Take some time to realise you are on exchange, so this semester isn’t quite the semester to do the exact same things as you’d usually do at home as well. This should be the semester of exploring new things and letting yourself go a little more. Studying, catching up on sleep, working out, or eating healthy are all perfect things to do at home, So this month, don’t go down before the moon does. Or do, we don’t judge, we will just text the Queen.
Pisces: Feb 19 – Mar 20
It appears that as soon as somebody with puppy-eyes approaches you, you immediately get out of the game and into the I-found-the-love-my-life-modus. Have some faith in us when we say you probably didn’t. Those aren’t weddingbells you’re hearing, that’s us trying to call you back to the bar. So snap out of it, have another drink, and move on to the next one.
Aries: Mar 21 – Apr 19
Soooo although we strongly advised you to take some more naps last time, it appears like you insists on depriving yourself of a decent amount of sleep. Resulting in some lovely bags under your eyes which strongly reminds us of a certain bamboo-eating, cuddleable creature. Basically what we are trying to say is that you should maybe take more naps, but less of them alone.
Taurus: Apr 20 – May 20
It will take another 10 days for Neptune and a comet to align and it would most definitely best to not have any physical interactions with people of the other sex before that happens. Maybe talk a little with Aries, and find a way to be in balance with yourself and your loneliness, even though options may be available.
Gemini: May 21 – Jun 20
Did you know that you can let yourself tested for std’s for free in the Netherlands. Just wanted to mention that.. We are glad to see though that you are trying to implement a slightly more healthy lifestyle than during the previous months. Eating fruits and stuff, good for you! Now if you’d only start going to the gym 4 or 5 times a week, it will maybe not be too late yet to get those extra exchange kilos off before you are forced to face your friends looking like a little Tweedledee.
Cancer: Jun 21 – Jul 22
Hey party-hardy, you do realise that the main concept of the students life is to be a student. As in, studying, and going to your lectures and the library and stuff. Of course we understand that this all kind of freaks you out (or at least, that’s what we conclude from the very small amount of times you’ve done any of this in the previous month), but it’s really time to get it all together a little and start getting nerdy.
Leo: Jul 23 – Aug 22
We would love to say that thanks to some fancy star collection, things are all going to get better from now on, but we kind of can’t. You really have to put the positiveness in by yourself this month. But hey, it’s all going to be okay! Just look the other way when you see your kitchen being all messed up again, don’t take every fight as a personal one and live a little in the moment. We are called Carpe Noctem for a reason, go and seize the night.